Monday, October 18, 2010


I'm too tired to really think straight.  We had a busy weekend, which I want to document, but I still need to recover.

It's hard to get a good night's sleep with Jeni getting up to go to the bathroom every 10 minutes, sometimes 5.  Really, I'm not exaggerating.  Devin and I timed the intervals.  Seriously, how can anyone need to go to the bathroom that often?!  She can't really be going to the bathroom.  She just goes in there, turns the light on, and closes the door (loudly) then goes back in her room.  Devin has come to the conclusion that Jeni doesn't really sleep.  She just lays in bed and gets bored so she gets up a lot.  Maybe.  He's probably right because this morning when I came out of my bedroom to wait for the daycare kids to arrive (at 6 am), I went to close her door and she was just sitting up on the bed in the dark.  It freaked me out.  I don't know what goes on with her at night.  I don't know but I wish she would just sleep so I could sleep!!!

Since I'm getting towards the end of my pregnancy (hallelujah!) I am feeling more tired again.  I was tired at the beginning, had a good stretch in the middle, and now realize the good stretch is dwindling down.  On Friday night, I went to bed at 11 pm and woke up at 9 am.  That's 10 hours of sleep.  Then Saturday night, I was exhausted by 9 pm!  After getting that much sleep the night before, I thought I'd be able to stay up a little later.  Having to wake up at 5:30 during the week really wears me out!  I feel like I never get caught up on the sleep I need.  I can't wait to exercise again.  I know that will help with my energy level.

Maybe there will come a day in my life when I don't have to take care of anyone besides my own kids.  No daycare kids, and no Jeni.  That would be so nice.  Devin and I are working on it, but change is rarely immediate.  It takes time.  Unlucky for me, I'm not very patient!  I want things to be different now.  But, I'm learning to wait.  Some days aren't so bad, but I am not really happy doing it.  I don't think my kids are always happy about it either.  They do like playing with other kids, but all day every day is a little too much for them and me.  Like I said, we're working on a change.

I don't know if it is because of the pregnancy, but my ability to deal with everything has not been up to the usual standard.  One specific thing is that I have no tolerance for whining.  With 6 kids and Jeni around, there tends to be a lot of whining I have to listen to.  Lets just say I'm thrilled when each weekend rolls around.  It means I get a (short) break and it's one week closer to the baby coming.

Despite the hard times, I am very blessed.  When I am having a hard day, I know it helps to focus on the blessings I have been given.  It also helps to serve others.  My goals:  be more grateful, serve more.  Oh, and get more sleep!


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